tHe unexpEcted foRever

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“I remember that it hurt,

looking at her hurts.”

Not to ignore each and everything that was happening to me irrespective of all the motives. She was someone so perfect in her own ways but for the first time in my whole life I was stopping myself from doing anything. Maybe it was my past. But to be completely honest “this feeling sucks”

When I look at her I just know there is nothing that can stop me from falling in love with her, and the worst part is I know I’m falling in love with her but still I’m stopping myself from doing this as if it could help.

And I know it won’t it never will.

I can’t stop myself from looking at her, whenever I see her face, her eyes, I feel relaxed and think that I can be happy and at the same times I realize how week I am, how after knowing my feeling for her I’m lying for reasons that I can’t even type in my journal.

My friends often say that if it makes you feel like a loser, then just stop looking at her. I’m trying to but I don’t want to. She makes me feel happy with everything she ever say or do I don’t know how but it’s true.

I think she feels shy when I look at her, but when she smiles and look away, God! It makes me want to be someone who is perfect for her.

I’m trying to.

Like Barney said,

“I love everything about her, and I'm not a guy who says that lightly, I'm a guy who has faked love his entire life, I'm a guy who thought love was just something idiots felt, but this woman has a hold on my heart that I could not break if I wanted to. And there have been times when I wanted to. It has been overwhelming and humbling, and even painful at times, but I could not stop loving her any more than I could stop breathing. I'm hopelessly, irretrievably in love with her. More than she knows.”

I know that we both are just opposite to each other... We don’t have any similarities or any kind of thing that we both like so basically,

We are just like the two extreme poles of our earth. We are holding this place up together. I don’t want you to change for me and I know you don’t want me to change for you because if we do, we will ruin this one thing that we have been holding up to this long. Let’s just say that we stay the way we are and be with each other forever...

Yes that is true that I'm in love with you. And to be completely honest I love this feeling. But you don’t have to worry I'm not going to act on it. That is just something that my heart forces me to do, and my brain resist me from doing it.

It is just one of those things.

It’s like writing a long story, you have to make some stuff up to keep it going and make it more interesting... I have been trying to make my life more interesting by making up some stuff. But some part of that story has already been written by that stupid guy above all. And the best thing that happened to me unexpectedly was You...

The unexpected forever.

-Shantanu Singh

 


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